...wherever you are.
...whoever you are.
My mind only knows of you in vague terms. Small characteristics that you logically would have to posses. You're a God fearing gal, who deep down feels the same pull to me as I do to you. And... that's all I know. I can guess at other things, but it's pointless. My preconceptions could only hinder or delay us being together. I'll know it's you when we meet. Simple as that.
Or, maybe not. It's completely possible that we already know each other, and we just don't know that we are for each other. Or, maybe I'll meet you later, and still not know for years that we're meant to be. The point is, at sometime or another we'll both catch on, and just know. And for now, I can't be letting my logic falsely represent you or give you characteristics you don't posses.
So in short, I'm not even sure if I've met you face to face or not. But one thing's certain. You exist.
You'd have to exist. My heart feels you. Or... doesn't feel you. Really, it's that my heart feels your absence.
When two things fit perfectly well together, you can easily see when one of them is missing. There's an imprint on the other, revealing its shape. You can't tell exactly what the other thing is, but you get a vague idea of what it must be like.
Me and you are this way. My heart feels the indent of where you should be. Your very absence proves your existence. And, if my heart has these notches that are as of yet attached to nothing, your heart (by very means of fitting in with mine), must have the exact same thing. I feel this incomplete puzzle of our souls, and long for the complete picture.
It hurts me to know that you feel my absence like I feel yours. I want to take it away, make you feel better. But I don't know how.. I don't even know who you are. How can I serve you if I don't even know your identity? But I do know we are meant for each other. And I know that my first (and for now only) way of serving you is to find you. And by finding you, ease your longing for my presence. By aiding you, my heart will be filled as well. As how it should, and will, always be.
I will find you. I hope soon, but I won't give up hope no matter how long it takes. You are my soul mate, my other half. I was created for you, and you for me. And as such, I'd do anything for you. I long for you with every breath. I go to sleep wishing you were by my side, even without knowing what that would feel like. I pray for you all the time. That God would guide and protect you until I can be there to do the same. I pray for Him to Guide us to each other fast, so that your pain may end sooner.
The hurt of my heart is a promise. It tells me you must be out there as a means to heal it. God doesn't provide a desire without a means of fulfillment. In revelation of this, I praise God for the amazing blessing that I know you'll be. In the meantime, it excites me to know you're out there. It's a beautiful thought, knowing we are being brought closer and closer to each other even as I write this. One day, hopefully soon, our heart's notches will align and fit into place. I look forward to that, and await the day with hopeful expectation. You already mean so much to me, and I look forward to growing along side you. Growing upward toward heaven, and entwining together ever the more until we become one being rather than two. Our souls are made to match step, and I want to dance with you into eternity.
God, please bring me to her.
As soon as possible.
Amen.
